"I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day."

Like a general novice writer my thoughts are not organised. I always deviate from the main topic. Also, I don't have agility to embellish my manuscript. So, most of you would find it oscitant. I also lack aplomb of stage. Those punctilious eyes, searching for even smallest errors, scare me. You must be thinking that my opprobrium is rather harsh and the guy is frustrated with his weaknesses. But i admit that you all are corrct. But I find ways to convince myself that I'm not that bad. In case of my inability to perform on stage I say to myself that I can't rape the audience as others do. One of my good freind remarked me "why do you contempt yourself?" but i just can't stop this. "The Almighty" had created this being similar to extremly powerfull Herculese, He-man, other successfull orators and conqueres of public attention. But I have ruined his creation. I have created many mental blockages for myself. I can't do this, I can't do that. Al